Abstract :
In this manuscript, I write about my ongoing exploration of my possible gendered future, using the avatar creation site Bitmoji as a virtual landscape through which to do so. To do so, I use an autoethnographic methodological process, allowing me to think about my own individual experience and how it is influenced by/influences broader macro-discourses of gender. As a result, I use my self-explorations to inform how others--in particular, college educators--think about gender as a mediating discourse throughout postsecondary educational contexts. In other words, my own searching for her, my feminine gendered self, exposes possibilities for gender-based praxis on college campuses. Keywords: Trans, femininity, autoethnography, online, bitmoji